1 00:00:07,114 --> 00:00:09,953 I can't remember the last movie we saw in theaters, 2 00:00:09,986 --> 00:00:11,924 and on opening night. 3 00:00:11,957 --> 00:00:13,728 Movies are back, baby. 4 00:00:13,761 --> 00:00:16,834 Just think of all the chumps out there waiting three days 5 00:00:16,834 --> 00:00:20,040 until this movie's free on streaming. 6 00:00:20,842 --> 00:00:23,046 [tires screeching] 7 00:00:26,988 --> 00:00:29,626 Now to watch this movie the way God intended, 8 00:00:29,659 --> 00:00:32,866 on a small screen and riddled with ads. 9 00:00:33,667 --> 00:00:37,643 I'm Dr. Janet Grody, creator of Snuf Total-Body Deodorant. 10 00:00:37,643 --> 00:00:39,947 It's for all your grossest places. 11 00:00:39,980 --> 00:00:41,951 Just rub it right on your butt cleft, 12 00:00:41,984 --> 00:00:44,088 under pouch, stink flaps... 13 00:00:44,121 --> 00:00:46,994 [groans] How can they say those words on TV? 14 00:00:47,027 --> 00:00:50,000 ...peat bog, smuckle, stunk-tank... 15 00:00:50,034 --> 00:00:52,873 [all snickering] 16 00:00:52,873 --> 00:00:55,645 Come on, skip ad. Skip ad. 17 00:00:55,679 --> 00:00:59,920 ...between-hatch, gunk chunnel, boob swamp, elbow crotch... 18 00:00:59,986 --> 00:01:01,156 [laughing] Elbow crotch. 19 00:01:01,156 --> 00:01:02,926 I have one of those. 20 00:01:02,992 --> 00:01:05,898 [Bart and Lisa laughing] 21 00:01:05,898 --> 00:01:07,835 [groans] 22 00:01:07,869 --> 00:01:08,704 Finally. 23 00:01:09,038 --> 00:01:12,879 You're a real man, and real men have scrotum dust. 24 00:01:12,879 --> 00:01:14,014 Oh, for the love of-- 25 00:01:14,048 --> 00:01:15,919 [announcer] Have you got butt-rot? 26 00:01:15,985 --> 00:01:17,889 -Mm-hmm. -[groans] 27 00:01:17,889 --> 00:01:19,993 -Does your stank stink? -[groans] 28 00:01:20,027 --> 00:01:22,866 Looks like it's dingleberry season. 29 00:01:22,899 --> 00:01:25,337 [laughter] 30 00:01:25,370 --> 00:01:26,873 Enough. 31 00:01:26,907 --> 00:01:28,878 [grunts, pants] 32 00:01:28,911 --> 00:01:30,147 Let's just do it old-school. 33 00:01:30,180 --> 00:01:32,385 DVDs were never dirty. 34 00:01:33,186 --> 00:01:36,927 Whoa, geez. Somebody had a crush on Kevin Kline. 35 00:01:36,927 --> 00:01:38,964 Shut up. Everyone did back then. 36 00:01:39,031 --> 00:01:41,035 [gasps] Keagan's Pond. 37 00:01:41,069 --> 00:01:42,839 Oh, I used to love this show. 38 00:01:42,872 --> 00:01:45,945 It's about four teenagers played by 20-year-olds 39 00:01:46,012 --> 00:01:48,150 with the problems of 40-year-olds. 40 00:01:48,183 --> 00:01:51,088 Oh, that show stinks. It stinks like stink flaps. 41 00:01:51,155 --> 00:01:53,026 Come on, Bart. We're going to Moe's. 42 00:01:53,059 --> 00:01:55,030 No Moe's on a school night. 43 00:01:55,063 --> 00:01:56,332 [both groan] 44 00:01:56,332 --> 00:02:00,073 ♪ Do-do-do-do-do, do-do-do-do-do... ♪ 45 00:02:00,107 --> 00:02:01,009 That's Keagan. 46 00:02:01,109 --> 00:02:03,881 I had such a crush on Shawn Garrett Evanson. 47 00:02:03,915 --> 00:02:07,221 He was just poured into that puka shell necklace. 48 00:02:07,221 --> 00:02:10,260 Mom. Shh, it's starting. 49 00:02:11,963 --> 00:02:14,903 Manliest shows for manly men. 50 00:02:14,936 --> 00:02:17,040 Hmm, Clincher. 51 00:02:17,074 --> 00:02:20,113 "Ex-Ranger, ex-CIA, ex-Navy SEAL John Clinch 52 00:02:20,180 --> 00:02:22,919 "doles out his own brand of justice 53 00:02:22,953 --> 00:02:23,988 with his fists." 54 00:02:24,055 --> 00:02:26,092 Buddy, you had me at "fists." 55 00:02:26,092 --> 00:02:27,194 [grunting, blows landing on laptop] 56 00:02:27,227 --> 00:02:29,131 Wow, not wasting any time. 57 00:02:29,198 --> 00:02:32,004 Shh. Punching. 58 00:02:32,071 --> 00:02:33,339 [acoustic guitar playing on TV] 59 00:02:34,977 --> 00:02:36,747 Keagan, what's wrong? 60 00:02:36,780 --> 00:02:38,951 Everyone's saying you cried at swim practice. 61 00:02:38,985 --> 00:02:39,987 I don't want to talk about... 62 00:02:39,987 --> 00:02:41,222 [crying] It's my dad. 63 00:02:41,255 --> 00:02:43,761 He says film school's for sissies. 64 00:02:43,794 --> 00:02:45,998 He wants me to be a wedding planner just like him. 65 00:02:45,998 --> 00:02:47,835 Hey, Scorsese. 66 00:02:47,902 --> 00:02:51,342 Come down and help your old man with his centerpieces. 67 00:02:52,979 --> 00:02:54,081 -Let's go. -Where? 68 00:02:54,115 --> 00:02:56,352 A place where we're always safe. 69 00:02:58,156 --> 00:03:00,026 Why are you so good to me? 70 00:03:00,093 --> 00:03:02,030 'Cause I'm with you for the long haul. 71 00:03:02,097 --> 00:03:04,034 As long as there's a pond and a ladder, 72 00:03:04,101 --> 00:03:06,338 I'll be there. 73 00:03:09,011 --> 00:03:10,113 Whoa! 74 00:03:10,146 --> 00:03:12,051 [both shout] 75 00:03:12,117 --> 00:03:13,286 [gasps] 76 00:03:13,286 --> 00:03:19,131 ♪ Do-do-do-do-do, do-do-do-do-do ♪ 77 00:03:19,164 --> 00:03:22,805 ♪ Do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do. ♪ 78 00:03:22,805 --> 00:03:25,812 He can't go to jail. He'll miss junior prom. 79 00:03:25,812 --> 00:03:28,985 Please tell me we have the season two DVD. 80 00:03:29,018 --> 00:03:31,255 Hmm, maybe in the attic. 81 00:03:32,190 --> 00:03:35,030 [grunting, blows landing on laptop] 82 00:03:35,063 --> 00:03:36,399 Found it. 83 00:03:36,432 --> 00:03:40,473 Oh, I forgot about this season's unfortunate haircuts. 84 00:03:41,877 --> 00:03:45,049 Whoa, this looks just like the dress Laney wore 85 00:03:45,083 --> 00:03:47,020 when she got drunk on cough syrup 86 00:03:47,054 --> 00:03:49,091 and blew her Juilliard audition. 87 00:03:49,158 --> 00:03:51,162 I was trying to look just like her. 88 00:03:51,195 --> 00:03:52,498 I guess we all were. 89 00:03:52,532 --> 00:03:53,967 [sighs] 90 00:03:54,001 --> 00:03:57,208 All these old clothes are actually kind of trendy again. 91 00:03:57,275 --> 00:04:00,246 You know, I bet that would fit you. 92 00:04:02,051 --> 00:04:04,088 -[grunts] -Hmm. 93 00:04:04,155 --> 00:04:05,223 [gasps] Oh. 94 00:04:05,290 --> 00:04:07,294 You look just like a little me, 95 00:04:07,327 --> 00:04:10,200 trying to look like a little Sarah Jennifer Judson. 96 00:04:10,234 --> 00:04:12,171 You should wear that to school. 97 00:04:12,204 --> 00:04:13,975 I don't know, Mom. I've kind of gotten 98 00:04:14,008 --> 00:04:17,347 used to flying under the radar, you know, attention-wise. 99 00:04:17,347 --> 00:04:19,451 But it's cute. 100 00:04:21,088 --> 00:04:23,861 It kind of is. 101 00:04:23,894 --> 00:04:25,230 And then, and then Clincher was like, 102 00:04:25,263 --> 00:04:26,365 "Peace be with you, Father," 103 00:04:26,365 --> 00:04:28,203 but he meant "piece" like a gun. 104 00:04:28,236 --> 00:04:31,041 Then he punched the priest with the gun. 105 00:04:31,075 --> 00:04:33,046 Oh, wow. 106 00:04:33,079 --> 00:04:33,981 Time for work, dear. 107 00:04:34,014 --> 00:04:36,185 The Clinker will be here when you get home. 108 00:04:36,219 --> 00:04:38,323 It's not Clinker, Marge, it's Clincher. 109 00:04:38,356 --> 00:04:41,295 Thank God she's good-looking, right? 110 00:04:42,097 --> 00:04:43,333 [Lisa] I don't know about this, Mom. 111 00:04:43,366 --> 00:04:46,238 Oh, Lisa. You're adorable. 112 00:04:46,272 --> 00:04:50,113 I guess, but what if someone looks at me? 113 00:04:50,147 --> 00:04:52,284 Oh, no one's gonna look at you. 114 00:04:52,351 --> 00:04:54,155 [groans] 115 00:04:54,221 --> 00:04:56,358 [overlapping shouting] 116 00:04:56,392 --> 00:04:58,496 [shouting stops] 117 00:05:01,302 --> 00:05:03,006 [groans] 118 00:05:03,039 --> 00:05:06,279 How cute was Lisa in her '90s look, Maggie? 119 00:05:06,345 --> 00:05:08,250 Pretty fly, I thought. 120 00:05:08,283 --> 00:05:11,155 It's so funny how things come back in style, 121 00:05:11,222 --> 00:05:12,892 like the word "fly." 122 00:05:12,926 --> 00:05:15,898 And she was worried about what the other kids would think. 123 00:05:15,898 --> 00:05:18,871 They'll think she's cute as a button, right? 124 00:05:18,904 --> 00:05:22,011 Right? Why, I bet wearing your mom's clothes 125 00:05:22,044 --> 00:05:27,087 is as cool today as it was when I was a girl. 126 00:05:27,120 --> 00:05:29,125 [gasps] What have I done? 127 00:05:29,125 --> 00:05:30,460 [pants] 128 00:05:34,268 --> 00:05:36,940 Janey, do you think this outfit looks okay? 129 00:05:37,007 --> 00:05:40,113 Uh, we're all waiting to hear what we think... 130 00:05:40,146 --> 00:05:42,117 from them. 131 00:05:42,117 --> 00:05:44,121 [Devin] Move. 132 00:05:47,595 --> 00:05:49,131 [gulps] 133 00:05:49,131 --> 00:05:50,534 [tires screech] 134 00:05:50,534 --> 00:05:54,141 [panting] Please don't be getting consoled by the janitor. 135 00:05:54,943 --> 00:05:58,149 Hmm, retro vibes but still of the moment. 136 00:05:58,183 --> 00:06:00,387 It tells a story, and that story 137 00:06:00,420 --> 00:06:02,490 is "look at my outfit." 138 00:06:03,293 --> 00:06:04,295 It works! 139 00:06:04,328 --> 00:06:05,631 [cheering] 140 00:06:07,301 --> 00:06:11,242 Ah, she took a risk, and it paid off. 141 00:06:11,275 --> 00:06:13,246 I can't believe it. 142 00:06:13,280 --> 00:06:16,620 My little girl is fashionable. 143 00:06:22,097 --> 00:06:24,268 And then at lunch, when I went up to return my tray, 144 00:06:24,302 --> 00:06:26,139 everyone clapped. [laughs] 145 00:06:26,172 --> 00:06:28,175 Oh, no, I can't go back 146 00:06:28,209 --> 00:06:29,713 to this dress 147 00:06:29,746 --> 00:06:31,984 that we bought at... CVS? 148 00:06:32,017 --> 00:06:35,056 Please tell me you have one more cool outfit. 149 00:06:35,090 --> 00:06:37,829 Oh, I can do better than that. 150 00:06:37,863 --> 00:06:40,199 ["The Bomb" by the Bucketheads playing] 151 00:06:41,903 --> 00:06:46,947 -♪ Whoo, whoo! ♪ -♪ Street sounds swirling through my mind ♪ 152 00:06:46,980 --> 00:06:51,188 ♪ Street sounds swirling through my mind ♪ 153 00:06:53,059 --> 00:06:55,063 ♪ Mind ♪ 154 00:06:57,033 --> 00:06:59,037 ♪ Mind. ♪ 155 00:07:00,039 --> 00:07:01,977 Hey, new kid. 156 00:07:02,044 --> 00:07:03,881 Huh? Me? Oh, I'm not new. 157 00:07:03,915 --> 00:07:05,751 I didn't ask for your life story, new kid. 158 00:07:05,785 --> 00:07:07,153 I'm Devin. Spelled like "heaven," 159 00:07:07,153 --> 00:07:10,127 but with a "D" and no "A" and an "I" for the second "E." 160 00:07:10,193 --> 00:07:12,097 Of course, you know Vidalia. 161 00:07:12,130 --> 00:07:13,199 No, we've never met. 162 00:07:13,233 --> 00:07:14,903 Lisa, darling. [kisses] 163 00:07:14,936 --> 00:07:17,007 We were worried you might be a one-fit wonder, 164 00:07:17,007 --> 00:07:19,211 but we've been loving the vintage looks. 165 00:07:19,244 --> 00:07:22,183 Welcome to Fashion Club. 166 00:07:22,217 --> 00:07:23,887 You guys meet in the music room? 167 00:07:23,921 --> 00:07:26,258 We took it over when Mr. Largo died. 168 00:07:26,325 --> 00:07:28,797 Mr. Largo died? 169 00:07:28,864 --> 00:07:31,102 Or he has jury duty? It was something dumb. 170 00:07:31,102 --> 00:07:32,772 Honey, I love your eye. 171 00:07:32,806 --> 00:07:35,110 You're coming thrifting with us this Saturday. 172 00:07:35,110 --> 00:07:36,212 Let's see you in action. 173 00:07:36,245 --> 00:07:38,149 Oh, that sounds fun. 174 00:07:38,216 --> 00:07:39,786 Downtown, noon. 175 00:07:39,820 --> 00:07:42,291 You better like boba, or I swear to God... 176 00:07:43,092 --> 00:07:46,231 Terri, I didn't know you were in Fashion Club. 177 00:07:46,265 --> 00:07:47,100 Where's Sherri? 178 00:07:47,200 --> 00:07:50,240 Please. Have you ever seen Sherri slay? 179 00:07:50,273 --> 00:07:52,211 Or so much as serve? 180 00:07:52,244 --> 00:07:54,114 Keep walking, Kmart. 181 00:07:55,250 --> 00:07:57,087 [motorcycle engine roaring] 182 00:07:57,121 --> 00:07:58,290 [tires screech] 183 00:07:58,323 --> 00:08:02,097 Guess which fist I'm gonna punch you off your chopper with. 184 00:08:02,130 --> 00:08:04,001 -Huh? -Wrong. 185 00:08:04,034 --> 00:08:05,103 [both grunt] 186 00:08:05,137 --> 00:08:05,938 [laughs] 187 00:08:05,972 --> 00:08:08,276 Hope that ambulance has medicine. 188 00:08:08,309 --> 00:08:10,146 Homer, we need your help. 189 00:08:10,146 --> 00:08:10,981 Smitty's trapped between two... 190 00:08:11,048 --> 00:08:13,286 [grunting, blows landing on tablet] 191 00:08:13,319 --> 00:08:15,157 He's running out of oxygen. 192 00:08:15,190 --> 00:08:16,258 Ooh. 193 00:08:16,325 --> 00:08:19,131 -[alarm rings] -[grunting and punching continue] 194 00:08:19,165 --> 00:08:20,300 [alarm stops] 195 00:08:20,333 --> 00:08:22,070 Lisa, look what's coming 196 00:08:22,103 --> 00:08:25,244 to the Springfield Convention Center this Saturday. 197 00:08:25,277 --> 00:08:26,847 Hmm? 198 00:08:26,914 --> 00:08:29,085 "Your favorite TV stars from the '90s 199 00:08:29,118 --> 00:08:32,057 in varying degrees of recognizability." 200 00:08:32,091 --> 00:08:35,163 And there's going to be a Keagan's Pond meet-and-greet 201 00:08:35,197 --> 00:08:36,934 at 2:00. 202 00:08:36,967 --> 00:08:41,175 Uh, Saturday? Mm, I sort of have plans. 203 00:08:41,175 --> 00:08:41,977 [sighs sadly] 204 00:08:42,044 --> 00:08:46,185 But I can totally meet you at 2:00. 205 00:08:46,185 --> 00:08:48,055 Mom and daughter day. 206 00:08:48,089 --> 00:08:49,324 Great. [gasps] 207 00:08:49,324 --> 00:08:51,997 My Frank Paul donkey shirt. 208 00:08:52,030 --> 00:08:54,903 I had so many great memories with it. 209 00:08:54,970 --> 00:08:58,042 And thanks to you, I have one more. 210 00:08:58,075 --> 00:08:59,178 [Marge sighs happily] 211 00:08:59,178 --> 00:09:00,380 Aw. 212 00:09:00,380 --> 00:09:04,087 Okay, if I'm gonna go shopping, I'm gonna need some money. 213 00:09:05,324 --> 00:09:06,993 $28. 214 00:09:06,993 --> 00:09:10,066 That should be more than enough to get a couple of cute fits 215 00:09:10,100 --> 00:09:11,336 at a thrift store. 216 00:09:11,336 --> 00:09:13,139 A hundred dollars?! 217 00:09:13,172 --> 00:09:16,145 For a T-shirt of an airline that doesn't exist anymore? 218 00:09:16,179 --> 00:09:19,217 Why is everything here so expensive? 219 00:09:19,251 --> 00:09:20,888 Uh, shop much? 220 00:09:20,922 --> 00:09:22,290 This is how the world of thrifting works. 221 00:09:22,290 --> 00:09:25,130 Some used-up 40-year-old donates a box full of clothes 222 00:09:25,163 --> 00:09:27,935 from when she mattered, then someone cool but scary 223 00:09:28,002 --> 00:09:29,171 slaps a huge price tag on it. 224 00:09:29,237 --> 00:09:32,344 So thrift stores aren't for poor people anymore? 225 00:09:32,377 --> 00:09:35,016 Oh, sweetheart, nothing is. 226 00:09:35,016 --> 00:09:37,354 What a racket. Let's ditch this place. 227 00:09:37,387 --> 00:09:40,193 I have a better idea. 228 00:09:43,165 --> 00:09:46,406 Hmm, everyone's either had way too much work done 229 00:09:46,472 --> 00:09:48,342 or not nearly enough. 230 00:09:48,375 --> 00:09:49,612 [gasps] 231 00:09:51,248 --> 00:09:52,384 S.G.E.! 232 00:09:52,384 --> 00:09:54,923 I can't believe I beat the crowds. 233 00:09:54,956 --> 00:09:56,158 Who am I making this out to, sweetheart? 234 00:09:56,192 --> 00:09:59,398 Oh, actually, I-I wanted to get a picture 235 00:09:59,431 --> 00:10:01,268 of you, me and my daughter. 236 00:10:01,301 --> 00:10:02,905 That counts as two selfies. 237 00:10:02,939 --> 00:10:04,174 I'm sure she'll be here any second. 238 00:10:04,174 --> 00:10:07,014 No worries. I can tell you all about my lawsuit 239 00:10:07,047 --> 00:10:09,285 against the makers of the Keagan's Pond slot machine. 240 00:10:09,351 --> 00:10:11,155 It's rigged against me. 241 00:10:11,221 --> 00:10:12,391 ♪ Do-do-do-do-do ♪ 242 00:10:12,424 --> 00:10:15,397 ♪ Da-da-da-da-da ♪ 243 00:10:15,397 --> 00:10:19,939 ♪ Da-da-da-da-da, ooh. ♪ 244 00:10:19,973 --> 00:10:21,075 Look, I got to get out of here, 245 00:10:21,075 --> 00:10:22,411 or these jerks are gonna charge me 246 00:10:22,444 --> 00:10:24,281 a full-day table rental. 247 00:10:24,314 --> 00:10:26,185 I can't believe it. 248 00:10:26,252 --> 00:10:27,187 Lisa stood me up. 249 00:10:27,220 --> 00:10:29,993 Sounds like your afternoon is free. 250 00:10:30,060 --> 00:10:32,163 Ever done it in a men's shelter? 251 00:10:32,197 --> 00:10:33,332 [grunts angrily] 252 00:10:35,505 --> 00:10:37,441 Ah. 253 00:10:37,508 --> 00:10:39,444 Ugh. Lisa, you are so lucky 254 00:10:39,512 --> 00:10:41,215 your mom kept all her old clothes. 255 00:10:41,248 --> 00:10:44,321 My mom sent all her cool looks to the victims of some flood. 256 00:10:44,387 --> 00:10:45,958 So selfish. 257 00:10:45,991 --> 00:10:48,429 I mean, look at how cool all the moms used to be. 258 00:10:48,462 --> 00:10:50,968 I bet every mom in town 259 00:10:51,001 --> 00:10:54,208 has an attic full of forgotten vintage clothes. 260 00:10:54,274 --> 00:10:55,443 I never thought of that. 261 00:10:55,476 --> 00:10:56,980 [gasps] 262 00:10:57,013 --> 00:10:59,351 This would be so cute as a crop top. 263 00:10:59,418 --> 00:11:01,322 Oh, maybe don't... 264 00:11:01,322 --> 00:11:02,323 Uh... 265 00:11:02,323 --> 00:11:04,428 What the heck is going on here? 266 00:11:04,461 --> 00:11:05,430 Mom. 267 00:11:05,463 --> 00:11:07,000 I waited for you for hours. 268 00:11:07,034 --> 00:11:09,104 I met Keagan. It was unsettling. 269 00:11:09,138 --> 00:11:11,977 And the whole time you were here, defiling my clothes 270 00:11:12,010 --> 00:11:13,479 with the cast of Euphoria? 271 00:11:13,547 --> 00:11:15,216 Oh, well, I-I didn't think 272 00:11:15,250 --> 00:11:17,020 you were ever gonna wear this stuff again. 273 00:11:17,087 --> 00:11:19,424 I mean, it doesn't even fit you anymore. 274 00:11:19,458 --> 00:11:21,329 -[others snickering] -Ooh. 275 00:11:21,362 --> 00:11:23,366 Excuse me? 276 00:11:23,432 --> 00:11:25,237 And even if it did fit, 277 00:11:25,270 --> 00:11:29,110 you're not cool enough to pull it off. 278 00:11:29,144 --> 00:11:32,217 That's it. I'm taking it all back. 279 00:11:32,250 --> 00:11:34,220 [grunting] 280 00:11:34,254 --> 00:11:35,490 Now who's cool? 281 00:11:35,490 --> 00:11:36,491 You, ma'am. 282 00:11:36,526 --> 00:11:39,464 Now make like a banana and peel. 283 00:11:39,498 --> 00:11:42,337 I get it in context, I guess. 284 00:11:47,514 --> 00:11:50,353 Lisa! Hey, girlie. Want to hang? 285 00:11:50,353 --> 00:11:51,288 You still want to hang? 286 00:11:51,355 --> 00:11:55,263 Even after my mom totally mommed out on us? 287 00:11:55,330 --> 00:11:56,432 [laughs] Please. 288 00:11:56,432 --> 00:11:58,504 We don't ditch people just for having crazy mothers. 289 00:11:58,537 --> 00:12:01,074 My mom once set fire to a piano store 290 00:12:01,141 --> 00:12:03,379 because she was trying to get a news anchor's attention. 291 00:12:03,412 --> 00:12:05,316 Ugh. Mission accomplished. 292 00:12:05,349 --> 00:12:07,521 Come on, we're gonna party at a friend's house. 293 00:12:07,555 --> 00:12:09,191 Ooh, a party? 294 00:12:09,224 --> 00:12:12,297 Playing Candy Land with Ralph is a party? 295 00:12:12,330 --> 00:12:15,369 Totally. You're stuck in Molasses Swamp again. 296 00:12:15,403 --> 00:12:17,174 I like swamp. 297 00:12:17,207 --> 00:12:20,347 Terri's been in the bathroom for a while. 298 00:12:20,380 --> 00:12:21,281 I'm gonna go check on her. 299 00:12:21,315 --> 00:12:24,321 If you see Ralph in the mirror, say hi. 300 00:12:24,321 --> 00:12:27,327 You know, Vidalia's been checking on Terri for a while. 301 00:12:27,327 --> 00:12:31,268 I'm gonna go check on Vidalia checking on Terri. 302 00:12:31,302 --> 00:12:33,306 Uh, that's weird. 303 00:12:33,372 --> 00:12:34,407 Time to go. 304 00:12:34,441 --> 00:12:36,546 What? Oh, okay. 305 00:12:36,546 --> 00:12:38,550 I'm popular. 306 00:12:40,454 --> 00:12:41,422 Why are we leaving? 307 00:12:41,455 --> 00:12:43,292 And why did we come? 308 00:12:43,325 --> 00:12:45,430 Shh. Man, what a haul. 309 00:12:45,463 --> 00:12:46,365 Vintage Abercrombie flannel, 310 00:12:46,365 --> 00:12:49,305 Guess overalls, spaghetti strap dress. 311 00:12:49,371 --> 00:12:50,206 [gasps] 312 00:12:50,206 --> 00:12:53,212 You stole Mrs. Wiggum's old clothes? 313 00:12:53,246 --> 00:12:56,419 It was just sitting in an attic, totally forgotten, 314 00:12:56,419 --> 00:12:58,189 just like you said. 315 00:12:58,222 --> 00:12:59,559 Great job as lookout, by the way. 316 00:12:59,559 --> 00:13:02,330 Oh, God. I was an accessory? 317 00:13:02,397 --> 00:13:04,569 No, this is an accessory. 318 00:13:04,569 --> 00:13:06,338 [screams] 319 00:13:06,371 --> 00:13:09,477 Ugh, you're right. You really don't have the head shape. 320 00:13:15,591 --> 00:13:17,962 Okay, okay, we're thieves. 321 00:13:17,995 --> 00:13:20,133 I'm a thief. I'm in a gang of thieves. 322 00:13:20,166 --> 00:13:23,005 I'm gonna go to jail, and they'll give me a tattoo 323 00:13:23,072 --> 00:13:25,276 and I won't even get to pick it. 324 00:13:25,310 --> 00:13:26,946 Girlie, relax. 325 00:13:26,980 --> 00:13:29,986 You had a genius idea. We just executed it. 326 00:13:29,986 --> 00:13:32,123 We're keeping these poor, neglected clothes 327 00:13:32,156 --> 00:13:35,029 out of the greedy clutches of Big Thrift. 328 00:13:35,096 --> 00:13:37,968 And we're recycling old clothes 329 00:13:38,002 --> 00:13:40,006 instead of supporting fast fashion. 330 00:13:40,006 --> 00:13:44,014 It's a victimless crime, which is the second-best kind. 331 00:13:44,014 --> 00:13:45,483 But it's still a crime... 332 00:13:47,454 --> 00:13:50,026 ...to look this good. 333 00:13:50,059 --> 00:13:52,030 I mean, it is a shame to just let 334 00:13:52,030 --> 00:13:54,168 such cool clothes go to waste. 335 00:13:54,201 --> 00:13:58,142 It's not like Mrs. Wiggum was gonna pass them down to Ralph. 336 00:13:58,176 --> 00:14:00,146 [gasps] Lisa, you're a genius again. 337 00:14:00,180 --> 00:14:03,052 We'll only hit boy moms' houses from now on. 338 00:14:03,119 --> 00:14:07,360 Oh, stealing from more moms? I don't know. 339 00:14:07,394 --> 00:14:08,496 [phone chimes] 340 00:14:08,496 --> 00:14:09,497 [Lisa sighs] 341 00:14:09,497 --> 00:14:11,135 [Marge] Hey, fashion girl, 342 00:14:11,168 --> 00:14:13,172 this is your basic mom. 343 00:14:13,206 --> 00:14:16,011 Don't forget you have a dentist appointment today. 344 00:14:16,044 --> 00:14:18,516 Hope you're not too trendy to sanitize your retainer. 345 00:14:18,516 --> 00:14:19,518 [grunts angrily] 346 00:14:19,518 --> 00:14:21,155 I'm in, but if we're gonna hit 347 00:14:21,188 --> 00:14:23,192 every boy mom house in town, 348 00:14:23,226 --> 00:14:26,064 we can't do it one awkward playdate at a time. 349 00:14:26,098 --> 00:14:29,237 We need to get all the moms out of the house at once. 350 00:14:29,237 --> 00:14:30,172 But how? 351 00:14:30,206 --> 00:14:32,009 [Skinner] Attention, students. 352 00:14:32,043 --> 00:14:34,281 Don't forget Saturday is the mother-son dance. 353 00:14:34,314 --> 00:14:37,487 So put on your boogie shoes and mother-respecting bow tis 354 00:14:37,521 --> 00:14:40,059 and get ready to par-tay. 355 00:14:40,059 --> 00:14:42,363 Oh, I'm sorry, I misread that. 356 00:14:42,397 --> 00:14:43,298 -Party. -Ugh. 357 00:14:43,332 --> 00:14:46,506 Thank God my mom's in jail for piano arson. 358 00:14:46,540 --> 00:14:48,176 This is perfect. 359 00:14:48,209 --> 00:14:50,413 All the moms will be out of the house. 360 00:14:50,413 --> 00:14:52,117 But what about the dads? 361 00:14:52,184 --> 00:14:54,522 I know just how to distract 'em. 362 00:14:54,556 --> 00:14:56,324 [grunts, screams] 363 00:14:56,358 --> 00:14:59,297 That's for checking my prostate. 364 00:15:00,299 --> 00:15:01,068 [Bart] No. 365 00:15:01,101 --> 00:15:02,203 [both grunting frantically] 366 00:15:02,236 --> 00:15:05,210 You can't make me go. 367 00:15:05,243 --> 00:15:07,213 Oh, come on. It's not gonna kill you 368 00:15:07,247 --> 00:15:10,219 to slow-dance with your mother in front of your friends. 369 00:15:10,252 --> 00:15:12,290 We don't know that for sure. 370 00:15:13,126 --> 00:15:15,096 Mother. Nice dress. 371 00:15:15,096 --> 00:15:17,401 Thank you. I'm glad it fits. 372 00:15:17,434 --> 00:15:18,537 [quietly] Barely. 373 00:15:18,570 --> 00:15:20,073 Why, you little.... 374 00:15:20,106 --> 00:15:22,110 -[grunts] -Break it up. Break it up. 375 00:15:22,110 --> 00:15:24,114 Forget it, Mom, she's not worth it. 376 00:15:24,114 --> 00:15:25,349 [groans] Come on, 377 00:15:25,383 --> 00:15:27,554 let's go to the stupid dance. 378 00:15:29,124 --> 00:15:31,095 There's a lasagna in the fridge. 379 00:15:31,128 --> 00:15:33,432 Eat around the beef. 380 00:15:37,407 --> 00:15:38,275 These are the houses 381 00:15:38,342 --> 00:15:40,213 of Springfield's former fashion hotties. 382 00:15:40,246 --> 00:15:41,348 The moms are at the dance. 383 00:15:41,382 --> 00:15:44,454 And I've got the dad distractor. 384 00:15:53,372 --> 00:15:54,441 He's Clinched. 385 00:15:54,475 --> 00:15:56,344 Let's go shopping. 386 00:15:59,350 --> 00:16:01,354 [grunting on TV] 387 00:16:07,534 --> 00:16:08,469 [lion roars on TV] 388 00:16:08,503 --> 00:16:10,507 [grunting] 389 00:16:18,523 --> 00:16:20,359 [snaps] 390 00:16:24,367 --> 00:16:25,504 [music playing] 391 00:16:25,504 --> 00:16:28,475 This dance is so lovely. 392 00:16:28,510 --> 00:16:29,410 Whose idea was it? 393 00:16:29,444 --> 00:16:31,281 Well, Mother and I have been going through 394 00:16:31,314 --> 00:16:32,149 a bit of a rough patch, 395 00:16:32,250 --> 00:16:35,223 and our couples counselor suggested it. 396 00:16:35,290 --> 00:16:38,196 Seymour, I didn't wear my fancy orthopedics 397 00:16:38,196 --> 00:16:39,330 for you to chitchat. 398 00:16:39,364 --> 00:16:42,538 I asked the DJ to play "Hungry Eyes." 399 00:16:42,605 --> 00:16:44,341 Bart, "Hungry Eyes." 400 00:16:44,407 --> 00:16:46,211 -["Hungry Eyes" by Eric Carmen playing] -Hmm? 401 00:16:46,278 --> 00:16:48,182 -You'll never catch me alive! -[gasps] 402 00:16:48,182 --> 00:16:51,488 ♪ Hungry eyes... ♪ 403 00:16:52,357 --> 00:16:55,229 Bart, if you don't boogie with me, 404 00:16:55,296 --> 00:16:58,536 I'll lead a mom dance in the center of the gym. 405 00:16:59,638 --> 00:17:02,545 Aha! [gasps] 406 00:17:02,578 --> 00:17:03,680 Huh? 407 00:17:05,316 --> 00:17:07,354 Okay, this is the big score. 408 00:17:07,387 --> 00:17:09,692 The mother lode of mother clothes. 409 00:17:09,692 --> 00:17:12,363 Martin Prince's mom. 410 00:17:12,363 --> 00:17:15,236 I heard her sister used to manage an Aeropostale 411 00:17:15,236 --> 00:17:17,642 and had a ten percent discount. 412 00:17:17,675 --> 00:17:19,545 -Whoa. -Whoa. -Whoa. 413 00:17:19,579 --> 00:17:21,682 Let's do this. 414 00:17:30,466 --> 00:17:31,368 Oh, my God. 415 00:17:31,401 --> 00:17:34,575 These sick freaks don't have a TV. 416 00:17:36,245 --> 00:17:37,681 Come on, pick up, pick up. 417 00:17:38,683 --> 00:17:40,486 [phone buzzes] 418 00:17:44,595 --> 00:17:46,365 [gasps] 419 00:17:46,398 --> 00:17:48,670 Spice Girls tour jacket. 420 00:17:48,704 --> 00:17:50,239 Jelly sandals. 421 00:17:50,273 --> 00:17:53,478 Sweatpants with words written on the butt. 422 00:17:54,347 --> 00:17:55,617 -[objects clatter] -Hmm? 423 00:18:00,527 --> 00:18:04,267 Old Man Prince is on the move. Get out of there. 424 00:18:04,267 --> 00:18:07,473 Guys, we got to go. We can climb down from here. 425 00:18:07,508 --> 00:18:08,609 [alarm ringing] 426 00:18:13,418 --> 00:18:15,590 [gasps] Mom's shirt. 427 00:18:17,561 --> 00:18:19,331 [deep voice] Attention, intruders. 428 00:18:19,398 --> 00:18:20,667 We know you're in the house. 429 00:18:20,734 --> 00:18:22,604 Police are on their way. 430 00:18:26,646 --> 00:18:27,413 Oh, no. 431 00:18:27,447 --> 00:18:29,417 Exit the premises immediately. 432 00:18:29,450 --> 00:18:32,289 I know that the neighbors always have a lot of cash. 433 00:18:32,323 --> 00:18:34,528 [voice shaking] They hide a key in the flower pot. 434 00:18:34,595 --> 00:18:35,563 [siren wailing] 435 00:18:35,563 --> 00:18:38,302 Aw, how did I ever rationalize this 436 00:18:38,335 --> 00:18:41,341 as anything other than a literal crime? 437 00:18:41,408 --> 00:18:44,648 I'm not a fashionista, I'm a criminal. 438 00:18:44,648 --> 00:18:47,286 [crying] 439 00:18:47,320 --> 00:18:48,322 [ladder clatters] 440 00:18:48,355 --> 00:18:50,360 M-Mom? [sniffles] 441 00:18:50,426 --> 00:18:52,297 I'll explain in the dinghy. 442 00:18:52,330 --> 00:18:53,332 Where did you get a dinghy? 443 00:18:53,366 --> 00:18:55,302 Do you want to escape or not? 444 00:18:55,336 --> 00:18:56,639 -[grunts] -Whoa! 445 00:18:56,673 --> 00:18:58,509 [siren wailing] 446 00:18:58,509 --> 00:18:59,344 [tires screech] 447 00:18:59,411 --> 00:19:01,348 While I'm busy get-away-paddling, 448 00:19:01,415 --> 00:19:04,755 why don't you tell me what were you thinking? 449 00:19:04,789 --> 00:19:06,358 I'm so sorry, Mom. 450 00:19:06,425 --> 00:19:08,663 You just wanted to bond with me, 451 00:19:08,697 --> 00:19:10,433 and I ruined it. 452 00:19:10,466 --> 00:19:12,638 I'm such terrible daughter. 453 00:19:12,672 --> 00:19:14,474 [crying] 454 00:19:14,508 --> 00:19:18,315 Remember, "I'm with you for the long haul. 455 00:19:18,348 --> 00:19:22,824 As long as there's a pond and a ladder, I'll be there." 456 00:19:24,494 --> 00:19:26,799 Wait, how did you know I was here? 457 00:19:26,832 --> 00:19:29,337 A mother always knows... 458 00:19:29,371 --> 00:19:32,644 is the name of the kid-tracking app I put on your phone. 459 00:19:32,678 --> 00:19:34,314 [Lisa] Oh. 460 00:19:34,347 --> 00:19:36,317 I also track your brother on here. 461 00:19:36,351 --> 00:19:38,322 See, he's still at the dance. 462 00:19:38,355 --> 00:19:39,457 Hey, this is actually kind of fun 463 00:19:39,490 --> 00:19:41,361 when it's not your own mom. 464 00:19:41,361 --> 00:19:42,832 Dip me, handsome. 465 00:19:42,832 --> 00:19:43,833 Mm! 466 00:19:43,833 --> 00:19:47,508 Hey, the lady came with me. 467 00:19:47,541 --> 00:19:50,379 The sirens stopped. Where are the cops? 468 00:19:50,379 --> 00:19:54,555 Your father said he'd take care of them Clincher style. 469 00:19:54,621 --> 00:19:56,491 [officer on tablet] You're under arrest, Clinche. 470 00:19:56,526 --> 00:19:59,832 [Clincher] Do I have the right to remain violent? 471 00:19:59,866 --> 00:20:01,736 [blows landing] 472 00:20:01,736 --> 00:20:02,571 [cheering] 473 00:20:02,638 --> 00:20:05,511 Yeah! Take that, you stupid pigs. 474 00:20:05,544 --> 00:20:07,715 So, your mom didn't even yell at you? 475 00:20:07,748 --> 00:20:09,484 Wow, she's pretty cool. 476 00:20:09,518 --> 00:20:12,423 Well, I am grounded for the next eight months. 477 00:20:12,490 --> 00:20:14,427 But when that's over, do you guys want 478 00:20:14,494 --> 00:20:16,699 to come over and watch Keagan's Pond? 479 00:20:16,733 --> 00:20:18,401 It's really good. 480 00:20:18,401 --> 00:20:21,441 Ew, why would anyone watch a show from the '90s? 481 00:20:21,509 --> 00:20:23,847 I love that dress, by the way. 482 00:20:23,880 --> 00:20:26,552 Oh, this? Oh, thanks. 483 00:20:26,586 --> 00:20:29,424 I've had it literally forever. 484 00:20:29,457 --> 00:20:32,430 -[horn honks] -Pick up the pace, people. 485 00:20:32,430 --> 00:20:34,401 I want everything you stole returned 486 00:20:34,434 --> 00:20:35,737 by the end of the day. 487 00:20:35,770 --> 00:20:37,841 Well, almost everything. 488 00:20:37,875 --> 00:20:39,845 [giggles] Ooh. 489 00:20:39,879 --> 00:20:44,421 ♪ Hungry eyes ♪ 490 00:20:44,421 --> 00:20:46,892 ♪ I feel the magic between you and I. ♪ 491 00:20:52,203 --> 00:20:57,179 ♪ I'm not gonna age 'cause I'll be young forever ♪ 492 00:20:57,179 --> 00:20:59,317 ♪ I'll be in high school ♪ 493 00:20:59,317 --> 00:21:02,356 ♪ For eternity ♪ 494 00:21:02,423 --> 00:21:04,361 ♪ I'm not gonna age ♪ 495 00:21:04,427 --> 00:21:08,335 ♪ And we'll always be together ♪ 496 00:21:08,335 --> 00:21:12,443 ♪ In a sort of teenage purgatory ♪ 497 00:21:12,443 --> 00:21:14,214 ♪ Da-da-da-da-da ♪ 498 00:21:14,280 --> 00:21:19,357 ♪ Do-do-do-do-do, do-do-do-do-do ♪ 499 00:21:19,423 --> 00:21:23,332 ♪ Do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do ♪ 500 00:21:23,366 --> 00:21:29,678 ♪ Do-do-do... ♪ 501 00:21:35,223 --> 00:21:36,224 Shh!